Consum (our local supermarket) is more than capable of dealing with hoards of people descending on it en masse – it does so every summer, especially when the massive Dreambeach festival is here in August. But like the best of us, it just needed a little notice. So last Friday people from Madrid with second homes here on the coast had fled the capital and brought their panic to little old us. Consum (bless it) was emptied.

 

Fear not, for by Monday morning you would never have known the panic that had ensued over the weekend, for Consum was re-stocked (including multiple pallets of multi-pack loo roll!) and ready for action.

 

Meanwhile, over the weekend, the Spanish Prime minister had announced that we were in a ‘state of alarm’ and by 8am this Monday morning, we were officially in lockdown. Prior to lockdown officially commencing, on Sunday afternoon the police were blowing their whistles at naked sunbathers ordering them to leave the beach which was a most entertaining sight from the comfort of our terrace – better than TV!

 

You are allowed to leave the house only for clearly defined reasons and must provide proof that this is what you are doing and furthermore, you must leave the house alone, go straight there and come straight back. Of the two of us, I seem to be more resilient than Steve when it comes to colds and flu, so I am the household’s nominated shopper. Considering we do EVERYTHING together…we work together, we go to the recycling together – we’re never apart – so doing the shopping solo is a strange experience for me and Steve knows only too well not to complain if I come back with a kiwi that’s too ripe or punnet of pears that are too hard!

 

I did another shop this morning armed with a shopping list created to accurate precision on exactly what we needed to survive another week. As there can only be a certain number of people in the supermarket at any one time, a short queue (only about five people) outside is the norm until it is your turn to be called in (and suitably sanitised). While I was standing in said queue, the heavens decided to open, so up the umbrella went, only for an old Spanish lady to stand right next to me in my personal space looking at me all soppy eyed. The next thing I knew, my arm had extended to cover her with my umbrella while I was getting completely soaked! “Muchisimo gracias” she kept saying and then she just disappeared “doesn’t she know what social distancing means for god’s sake” I said to the fellow people queuing who were already laughing at my plight. Oh yeah, the virus is probably incubating in my lungs as I type this. Great. Then I looked at my shopping list which was by now illegible because my dear Steve had written it (knowing it was due to rain)…in fountain pen. I felt embittered. 

 

But it's easy to get paranoid and worried every time you have a sore throat, or cough or you feel a bit hot or cold. We've both had sore throats on and off for a while but recently our neighbour explained it was all the pollen in the air from our pine tree and eucalyptus all flowering and covering everything on our terrace in a film of yellow dust even as I type. We can't blame every isolated cough as a symptom of the C-word.

 

The information from the Spanish authorities has been plentiful, clear and concise. It makes sense. I saw an info-graphic which explains the benefits of reducing human contact = reducing the number of people infected. So, as a couple, if only one of you goes out for the essential food shop, already you are 50% less impactful on further infection. It’s a simple case of maths and most of us – especially the Spanish - are taking it very seriously – and we should.

 

Sadly, certain (but not all) expats – and not just the Brits to be fair, are having difficulty getting their heads round these protocols. You should see some of the questions on social media. Question: “My neighbour wants to come with me to the supermarket. Can she come in my car with me?” Answer: “No, she must drive herself.” Question: “but what if she suddenly lost the sight in both eyes or lost her arms ‘n’ legs? Can she come with me then?” We all hate a troll, but honestly, sometimes you just feel like you’re being pushed to it…

 

Have you ever seen that film The Exorcist? The bit where the demon possessed little girl’s head goes green and turns 360 degrees? Well, that’s me when I see neighbours not observing the very important protocols on home isolation and social distancing. So when I see neighbours receiving visitors (plural) sitting in the garden socialising – I am that little girl from The Exorcist. Steve was worried my head was going to spin off and suggested I find a way to channel my negative energy. So what did I do? Commit murder? Fire a catapult? No. I quietly sat down at my computer and created public information leaflets ready to post into the mailboxes of the offenders! Oh my God I’m turning into a mailbox troll, el. oh. el. reader, el. oh. El. and pee em es el at the same time!

 

But on a serious note, we don’t know how this will affect business and businesses. We will just have to wait and see. It’s scary for us. We have already had to have a couple of difficult conversations with people that were due to come this month. We remain on the ‘wait and see’ front but we really do appreciate the understanding and cooperation of those we have had to speak with already. We also appreciate the little text messages from guests past and present who have asked how we are. We really appreciate it and it especially helped us last weekend when it all started to take a turn.

 

If you are reading this from a country that is yet to go on lockdown (and your turn will come I’m sure), please take heart that it is okay. If you need reassurance on anything, just drop us a line.

 

So. What are my top tips for keeping coron-anxiety at bay?

1. Only get information from official sources – if I had a penny for every self-appointed expert on Facebook …and people actually act on their advice! 
2. Don’t overdose on news. I found myself falling into this trap and it just increases anxiety. Instead, schedule one time each day to get yourself up to date, then leave it until the next scheduled time tomorrow. 
3. Don’t make it the one and only topic of conversation with your partner – think of different topics to discuss…that annoying neighbour, perhaps? Flowers in the garden? How you can get revenge on that relative that said nasty things about you on Facebook? Fantasising becoming a witch and casting evil spells on anyone that’s ever wronged you in your life? The list is endless. 
4. If in lockdown, do positive things with your time, rather than just scrolling through the internet and going mad. Is there an elderly neighbour you can phone to check if they are okay? Perhaps you can finally write that poison pen letter to your worst enemy but have never had the time before? Never speak nasty words, just pop them on a postcard. And so on.

You see? We must keep positive at times like this.

 

Everyday since lockdown, Steve has been posting photos onto our Instagram, Facebook and Twitter of the beautiful beach here at VP. The reason, as he states in the caption of these posts is “During this period of essential closure we will bring you some of our recent photos to remind us all of the beauty of Vera Playa naturist beach. Good times will be back, stay positive everyone, we will enjoy again” – so do enjoy them, positive that we will get through this uncertain time.

 

So, keep that chin up (all of them) and we shall be right as rain in no time. Spring is coming so let’s look ahead with optimism and hope.

 

Keep safe, speak soon.