So after a day sunbathing on the beach, we got home, showered and got ready to go out for dinner with some friends and I thought to myself “ooh, I’m going to try that after sun – what decadence!” 

On I smothered it, like the stuff was going out of fashion. I emerged from the bathroom feeling soft-skinned and refreshed. It wasn’t until later when we were in the restaurant that Steve noticed I was covered in glitter – head to toe! Returning home, I re-checked exhibit ‘A’ the guest-donated after sun, only to notice that in Spanish it said something along the lines of ‘soothe your skin and glitter all night long.’ Thankfully my tan this time of year is so dark that it hides my blushes! 

Moving on to a weather report now. Even in winter, rain is a rare occurrence here at VP. We’ll go for months without seeing any – then we’ll get a deluge for a few hours, it’ll stop, the sun will come out, the sky will turn blue... the rain drains away and you’d never know there had been any. That’s how it works here – perfect. So when we got the full works last weekend – thunder, rain and terror of terrors – lightening - social media went into meltdown. Honestly, you’d have thought it was Noah’s Ark’s second coming! 

Our Whatsapp, email and Facebook messengers were pinging from concerned friends, past guests and relatives. Neighbours who don’t live here all year round were getting in touch to ask if their property had been swept away along with the unicorns. Now let me set the record straight reader: This happens every time we get a bit of rain. The flooding means you must take swift action for your personal safety and head for higher ground immediately - that’ll be, erm, the pavement. The photos look dramatic, but look closer and you’ll see the water is no higher than the bottom part of the car tyres. 

Being Spain, everyone loves the drama, folk leave their homes and flock to the streets, gossiping, pointing and lapping up (pardon the pun) the drama with the aid of old broom handles as walking aids because it can be very dangerous wading in water that comes up to your ankles you know! It brought a tear to my eye watching the local menfolk rush to the aid of the most severe casualty – a beaten old 1998 Renault Clio that had inhaled too much water through its exhaust pipe and needed to be pushed to safety. Then there was a plume of acrid smoke bellowing into the air above VP – an old BMW 5 series having had the guts revved out of the clutch in order to get through the water had sparked an electrical fault and the whole car went up in flames – honestly, it was like Armageddon. I was half expecting Jason Statham to appear and rescue us all from the bedlam. As the drama waned, the surface water drained away, the council workers arrived with their usual cleaning equipment, all returned to normal. End of weather report. 

It is at this time of year you see a real sea-change in the atmosphere at VP. Gone is the hustle and bustle of July and August when most of the Spanish families take their holidays. It’s lovely to see several generations of families on the naturist beach enjoying quality time together as nature intended. Now we are way into September, you notice the beach is more couples enjoying the quieter beach while the weather is still scorchio – and as for the sea…it has had all summer to bring it to the lovely warm temperature it is now – no wonder it is the month in our calendar that gets booked first.  

Anyone impressed with the latest series of X Factor? We’re not. So when we settled down the other evening to watch the opening show of the series, glass of wine ready to have its first sip gulped, we were almost relieved when a lovely couple staying in our Almodóvar apartment phoned in a bit of a daze. 

They had gone on a sightseeing jaunt to Mojácar Pueblo – a pretty white washed village a short drive away, and had returned to the car only to discover a flat tyre. Initially unfazed, they opened the boot to get the spare and change it over only to discover the hire car company had in their wisdom removed the spare! We have since learned this is an increasingly common practice of the hire car companies for some reason unknown to the logical thinker. Anyway, they had already spoken to the hire car breakdown people, but we decided it would be far easier if we just popped up there and got them home ourselves, then the recovery can be dealt with in the morning, in daylight. I certainly wouldn’t want to be stuck half way up a mountain at 9pm on a Saturday night – nor did we want to watch X Factor, so it was an easy choice to make. Our lovely couple were eternally grateful and the whole thing got sorted in the morning in the form of a hulking great brute of a truck driver with whom they had to share the front seat of the recovery truck. It’s at times like those you just have to rely on small talk albeit in another language. 

Anyway, I’m signing off. Got a changeover to do…if they’ve left any after sun, I promise to check it for glitter content before applying – it’s called the sparkle factor!